Tips on Toilet Training

Some things that parents ask about are:

• When do I start a Toilet Training Program?
• How Do I Start a Toilet Training Program?
• How to I get my child to stay in the bathroom long enough to be successful?
• What if my child won’t stay in the bathroom without tantruming?

When to start:

Many parents think that this is related to a particular age,” My son is 3 years old, so I need to start toilet training him.” This is not necessarily true, especially with children who have developmental delays or sensory issues. Instead look for cues from your child before you start the program. Do they stay dry for 2-4 hours at a stretch or even over night? Do they get upset if they have a dirty diaper? Do they come to you with a clean diaper when they want to be changed? Do they hide when they have a bowel movement? These are all cues that your child is ready to start a scheduled program.

How to start:

It is never too early to start this process. You can prepare your child for eventual toilet training without actually putting them on the potty. This is a good practice as some children do not have positive associations with a bathroom. They may see it as a place that means I get wet, then I am dried off, stuffed into pajamas and my teeth are brushed. If they don’t like bathing or need an adult to brush their teeth, then the bathroom might not have a lot of happy memories for them and they might object to being it their. What is important is that the child learns that this is not only a room for bathing and brushing teeth. To help them see this they need other people to model proper toileting behavior, so they might observe a parent, sibling or other close relative using the toilet and learn that this is just a natural part of life. It is also important to create an environment which encourages the child to linger so that they have more time to be successful.

Creating an environment:

This may be as easy or as complex as you like it to be. Some suggestions that work for me include posters of favored characters, books to look at, handheld games or toys all to distract them from the monotony of waiting. You may also decide that you want to reinforce/ reward your child when they are successful so you might have a special treat or prize (m & m’s are popular, a stamp, stickers) that you have placed where the child can’t get to it. However you decide to do this is up to you, there is no right answer. One word of caution though, do not punish the child when they have an accident. Everyone has accidents or makes a mistake, that is part of learning and you want them to continue learning to be toilet trained. I recommend that if your child has an accident deal with it as calmly and pleasantly as you can and encourage them that next time they can be successful.

Making Adjustments:

Some children, no matter how nice an environment you create, do not want to stop what they are doing to go all the way to a bathroom. To address this I suggest that you place the potty chair in the room they spend the most time in. When my kids were little this was the living room. I understand that some adults will object to this as being unhygienic or inappropriate, but the goal is for the child to be successful at toileting and as they are you will begin to move the potty chair closer and closer to the bathroom so that eventually it is in the bathroom and the child will not have noticed. They will have developed the habit of using the potty chair where ever it is. For those friends and relative who think it is unhygienic, let them know that you show the child how to properly clean to potty chair, and that it is never left dirty. If they still object offer them the opportunity to take over the toilet training.